History Repeats Hashbrowns

I am struggling. I am in need of a blog entry for Old Testament and nothing comes to mind other than the fact that I'm lost in the Exile. How many times must I ask myself if Jerusalem is north or south? How often must I double check the geography of the Northern Kingdom? Is it the travesty it seems that I have no clue who Gedaliah is, why he is important? I'm swimming in a pool of acrostic poetry, doggy paddling in lament, and about to be taken under in a dirge.

We have attempted in class to set the time frame in order. More than once. Several times actually. My notes resemble smothered and scattered fries at the Waffle House. The triple order. Smothered. Covered. Chunked. Diced. Peppered. Capped. Topped. In other words, "All the Way" with a sweet tea chaser.

To date, this is the best I can offer...

• Once upon a time there was a kingdom named Israel
• The Assyrians take Israel. (722)
• Then there were two parts (why?) - North and South; Israel and Judah; Samaria and Jerusalem.
• Judah was initially left alone. The Assyrians eventually take Judah, and look towards Jerusalem.
• Jerusalem stood (with water); Hezekiah gave tribute and was left to stand alone.
• Along came Babylon who took Assyria, thereby taking Nineveh. (612)
• People rejoiced! People breathed. There was hope.
  
• Josiah comes along... And does what exactly?
  

David is in there too somewhere, wearing a nice little proverbial crown around 1000. Some sources with nice round capital letters begin to appear somewhere around Josiah. THEN I am ok. The rest looks like this:

• 586/7 Babylonians take Assyrians & Jerusalem; Enter The Exile
• 539 Persia takes Babylon (Cyrus); End of The Exile
• 515 Jews rebuild the second temple
• 332 Enter the Greeks who take Persia (Alexander the Great); Antiochus IV succeeds him
• 167 Antiocus IV desecrates the second temple (and sells off the priest seat); Rumour of his death leads to Maccabean revolt; hellenism instituted
• 164 Antiocus IV kicks the bucket; end of the Maccabean revolt; BIG party in the temple (okay, maybe not IN the temple...)
  

To remember who took whom and when, I created the Gas-Movie System aka B(P)G. Babylon - Persia - Greeks. (BP-PG essentially.) This is a good thing as history repeats itself. At least I can stock up on Craftsman tools for the next temple rebuilding, should my assistance be requested.

But the rest of this - what a mess. Feel free to pass along your two cents. There might just be some hashbrowns in it for you!