Dis-orientation

When one becomes oriented you hope they have a sense of where they are on a map, in a project or among a new group. They are no longer dizzy, lost, nor alone. When oriented, you become in tune with your surroundings and with how things work. I am reminded of a time when practicing search and rescue techniques, I was dumped into the middle of a great forest (also known as a local park – the kids playground was 100 yards off to the west). Left blindfolded, at night, without a moon, but with a compass, a bottle of water and beef jerky I was to practice using senses and skill to find my way. This would not have been an issue had I known I was in the park with said playground 100 yards off to said east, had I not been driven for two hours, had I had some light, and had it not been raining in a sleeting kind of way. You know, had I been in

Of course, as one may become orientated one may also become disoriented. Disorientation happens when one becomes confused about, well, frankly, anything. Yes, anything. A child whose mother says “No, you may not have the Hanna Montana mini BMW that has a V-8, custom paint job, leather interior, specialized cup holders and pull down mirrors complete with Hanna Montana makeup built ins and a pair of matching pink Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses” is often disoriented when her expectations were crushed by her parental unit.

Then there is the ACT of orienting – when one, or many ones, gather together to yank you out of your confused, lost, disoriented state, sit you down and explain things to you and show you stuff. This act is designed, in addition to helping you become oriented, to calm the nerves, and hopefully when done well, to help you feel welcome.

As such, I was recently oriented. Graduate schools are interesting places when you have not attended a level of really really higher learning. (I use two reallys here as “higher learning” usually applies to “college” so really really higher seems appropriate…) In really really higher learning your parents are not there to sign away their retirement in tuition, board, a new car, and your custom vintage Smurf comforter you have to have because it is just SO COOL. In higher higher learning it is you signing away your paychecks for the next 20+ years so you can have ramen noodles, free wi fi and a vintage bicycle in not-so-mint condition and your kids, should you have any, hear that they cannot have a Hanna Montana mini BMW with which to play.

This changes things, especially for those who are new to the game.

You are probably wondering just how my orientation went. So a few thoughts…

1. I survived.
   
2. I met some groovy folks.


3. I discovered that I really really want a set of those Hanna Montana custom make up mirrors built into my vehicle but tricked out with leather and stocked with MAC and a variety of other fine makeup purveyors.

Welcome to the new class my friends. It’s a long ride.